Tips to a girl from a dysfunctional family

Try like your mother tries to become your best friend,

During droughts of your mood swings,

When you want to go days without talking to that annoying lady,

In the apron,

Who competes with herself one meal at a time,

For the smile or nod she never gets from you. Period.

Try as hard as she tries,

To resist the urge to run away

From the jagged ruins of a place called home,

One step. Two step. Three step. Stop. U-turn. Retrace.

After several years, she has mastered the routine now.

That’s how you will learn perseverance from your mother.
Try like your younger sister tries to become your duplicate

Only, first make it Crystal clear that 

You are made up of more cracks and fissures than muscles and bones.

And that’s how poison leaks into your bloodstream 

And comes out of your mouth

As lethal words that were never meant to stab her, but did.

Try as hard as she tries

To impress you with her poetry,

Did you know that she liked her music better than her words?

Didi: Ctrl plus C. Ctrl plus V. 

Did you ever tell her that you liked her lip gloss on her lips better than your lipstick on her lips? 

Didi: Ctrl plus C. Ctrl plus V.

Did you tell her that she needn’t be the perfect replica of you? 

That her imperfections were more precious to you than her report card?

Never tell her this and 

That’s how you will learn endurance from your sister.
Try like your father tries to be your comrade

In the fights fought against your wants,

And thoughts.

How he subtracts parts from his pride

And adds it to yours,

Each time you desire something.

The bicycle

The guitar 

The school trip

Atheism

Radicalism 

Dissent.

Discussions.Shouting. Convincing. More Shouting.

Try as hard as your father, and you will learn to give up everything for the ones you love, Except your beliefs.
You will learn to live by principles from your father. Even if those principles are his, and not yours.
Try like your home tries to stand strong against the tornado spinning inside it,

With rubble from leftover conversations and heated discussions flying in all directions,

Try as hard as the doors and windows struggle to keep the loud voices concealed inside its walls.

And notice, how despite this chaos on the inside,

It looks perfectly calm on the outside.
That’s how you will learn the art of containment.
Lastly,

Try like yourself.

The way you did,

Before you forgot what it’s like to love and to be loved by the ones you called your own.

Try.

Fall. Get up.

Try.

Give up. 

Try again.

Try. 

Try.
Learn and I will know what you learned.
Yours,

Future you from your *Family.

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