Have you ever choked on water?
And not drowning?
Feels the same.
Like it’s necessary
And not wanted.
Like its needed,
But not needed
feels like a stubborn prick under the skin,
a defiant artery choosing to carry impure blood,
an underlying sense of bafflement
settling over the calm of your mind,
a constant fight between tears and laughter
the pain felt when you accidentally bite your tongue
Feels like there’s no room for doubt
But plenty for denial.
And when it settles in,
Like there’s nothing
Left to know
In this world